Galactic Politics on Cassette Future Magazine

Faces Carved in Stone: Council Chairman Attempts to Add His Face to Galactic History. Again.

Tue, 05 May 2026 17:31:37 +0000

Faces Carved in Stone: Council Chairman Attempts to Add His Face to Galactic History. Again.

I just think it’s funny—

On the 14th of this cycle, Earth Unified Council Chairman Harlan Voss posted to his personal neural feed a photoshopped image of his own face nestled among the four founding figures carved into the Monument of Unified Ascent on Luna’s southern plateau.

You know the one. The big rock. The sacred thing. The monument that took sixty years and eleven million labor-hours to complete and which three separate Interstellar Assembly resolutions have designated 永遠の遺産 — eternal heritage — protected from alteration, commercial use, or, one would have thought, neural-feed vanity posts.

On the Road to Armageddon

Sun, 22 Mar 2026 11:40:04 +0000

On the Road to Armageddon

I had thought the Earth Unified Council had hit a new low point last week when the Galactic Arts Commission approved a Millennium commemorative quantum hologram featuring Council Chairman Drake leaning against his command podium with plasma cannons crossed and glowering—but that was before Defense Secretary Magnus Vex demanded 200 trillion Standard Galactic Credits from the Interstellar Assembly for what he calls “comprehensive defensive preparations.”

Oops: Earth Council Chairman Kills Future Proxima Leaders in 'Peacekeeping Operation'

Tue, 03 Mar 2026 15:21:57 +0000

Strategic Miscalculation

The Earth Council Chairman told Galactic Broadcasting yesterday that the initial phase of Operation Proxima Freedom successfully “neutralized key targets” - targets that, according to his own staff briefings three days earlier, were supposed to become the new provisional government.

The manifest doesn’t match the cargo. Again.

The Numbers Don’t Add Up

Operation cost so far: 847 billion Standard Galactic Credits. Projected installation budget for new Proxima leadership: 2.3 trillion SGC over five years. Current status of preferred candidates: vaporized in the opening bombardment.

GCB 'Peacekeeping Operation': Alpha Centauri Regime Change

Mon, 16 Feb 2026 16:08:22 +0000

連邦準備銀河の「平和維持作戦」：アルファ・ケンタウリ政権交代

GCB ‘Peacekeeping Operation’: Alpha Centauri Regime Change

経済制裁が失敗した後、軍事介入が開始

The Galactic Central Bank’s “humanitarian intervention” on Alpha Centauri ended yesterday with the installation of Administrator Chen Wei-Lin, former GCB deputy director. The previous administration—elected six months ago on a platform of credit independence—was dissolved “for the colony’s own protection.”

GCB Chairman Morrison called the operation “a measured response to financial terrorism.” The terrorism? Alpha Centauri’s refusal to adopt the new Standard Galactic Credit protocols that would have transferred 40% of their resource extraction revenues to Earth.